Day One, cont.

Actually, I think that in this life, its always Day One cont.

Does the real world understand how difficult it is to simply exist?

Probably not. I didnt. I used to take it all for granted.
I personally was totally scared by George Qrwell's 1984 when I read it so long ago. Thought yeah........ uh huh right.
This is what we are and how we are to be and just continue to follow the yellow line and you will be as we want you to be, without personality.


But dang... someone had to break that line somehow! I mean, WoW!!! I have emotions. I have my own feelings, I care, I laugh and .... gasp! I actually enjoy laughing!
But, the people that I was with at that time,,,, didnt understand. Personality was discouraged.
talk about? oh yes.. lets talk about.... it was about who was better, who was worse, who was doing who, who did who, who didnt do who, who was doing who next? who was leaving who to do who? and let's not forget YOU did WHO????

Ummmm 'scuse me? has anyone ever read a book? or caught that great film last week? Ah no. course not. silly me... what was I thinking?????? Did you even bother to watch the news to see what the real world was doing????
but even worse was " did you even think to simply ask me if I had had, "a nice day?" and MEAN IT????

Guess what. More often than not, I didnt have a nice day.

I didnt fit in.
I didnt laugh at the right time
I spoke at the wrong time
I didnt speak at the right time
When I did speak, it was the wrong thing to say

After a while, I learned.
I learned to keep my opinions to myself
to keep my mouth shut and to NOT FEEL.

If you FEEL, you CARE.
If you CARE, you FEEL.

They do not want that!!!